I dont know what to title this one

Hey, got THREE games for you today, so STRAP IN. Firstly, do you remember FLAPPY BIRD? That stupid phone game that used assets stolen from Super Mario? Bought by so many people the guy who made it can probably retire? Made by that guy who had a nervous breakdown or something over Twitter and then took the game off the market? Yeah, that game, what if I told you there were free versions of that game all over the internet? "Fly thing between, over, and around obstacles and not crash" isn't exactly a new concept. So if you were actually considering spending cash to get it before it was taken off the market, and you feel like you missed out on something 1) I feel sorry for you, 2) Don't worry I got a couple different options for you 3) Whyyyyyyyy.

"It's totally the new Dark Souls you guys!"

Lets move on to something else. Metroidvania's are nice, so lets break out one of those. Lets see what the guy who made it himself, Derek Yu, has to say about Eternal Daughter, the third game for you today.
"Eternal Daughter is an epic platform game that took myself and my friend Jon two years to make and nearly destroyed our immortal souls. It's an homage to some of our favorite games from our preteen years, like Super Metroid and Castlevania: SOTN.
Even though the gameplay is familiar, the world, the characters, and the story are all our own. The game also marks my first teaming up with Swedish music virtuoso, David Saulesco, who produced an original soundtrack for the game. We've been happy together ever since."
YOU READ THAT? All original art, all original music. Two years of effort to make. You cant expect that some everyone, because. SOME. PEOPLE. Can't handle it. You should know what a Metroidvania is at this point, and if you dont well just grab this and find out!

It's got boss fights, making this more like dark souls than flappy bird

You can snag Eternal Daughter here (at the bottom), and you can try a free, weird multiplayer version of Flappy Bird here, and you can find one of the games Flappy Bird rips off here

Steam powered sword wielding robots on another planet

Know whats great? Robots (When they aren't rising up against us). Know what isn't all that great? Crazed wild life, rabid animals, demons, sentient plants, and violent elemental creatures (unless they're attacking someone you don't like, then its great!) So lets talk about a game that has all of that, and way more! That game is Spiral Knights

SPIRAL KNIGHTS

Spiral Knights is of those massively multiplayer RPGS. It's pretty action oriented, instead of having a large overworld to explore, the game play mostly takes place in the semi-randomly generated dungeons, full of treasure, traps, monsters, and boss fights. The gameplay feels like the Four Swords Zelda game, especially with a party fight along side. Like all MMOs, you can play it solo if you want but its not as good as playing with a group, so your mileage may vary. The art for the game is great, lots of color and fun designs, you can tell the artists had fun with this project.

"Hey"

The reason why I never talked about this game before was because of the system that would limit how many dungeons you could enter per day, and how many times you could resurrect after dying per day, and seeing as they let you just buy more time that was HOW THEY GOT YOU, but in a recent patch they've eliminated that system and the game is getting a second wind because of it, so if there's a time to jump in, its now.

ADVENTURE is calling

If any of that sounds good to you, or you just want to play dress up in a video game, or you like the idea of robots wearing armor, or you're one of THOSE people and just want to scream obscenities into the chat to bug other people then Spiral Knights might just be for you!

Time to go fight EVERYTHING

You can snag Spiral Knights here

You will learn to hate two of three colors

"Hey guys more updates soon" and then there was nothing, this is a bad habit I need to break, but now I'm so mad I need to shoot someone in the face, let me show you how to do that without getting thrown in jail. My method will in fact allow you to shoot LOADS of dudes in the face. That method is "play this video game", the video game in question being PlanetSide 2.

The game world is big, either hoof it or catch a ride

The basic frame work of the game is that its one of those MASSIVELY ONLINE MULTIPLAYER games, built around three factions fighting in the future on another planet: The Terran Republic, the New Conglomerate, and the Vanu Sovereignty . Each side has their own color scheme, unique weaponry and vehicles with their own distinct silhouettes, overall weapon balance (IE: rapid fire, damage, accuracy drop off, ect), and each has their own separate reasoning to fight. Something about the original PlanetSide spawned a rabid loyalty in the players to the sides they chose that lived from the end of PlanetSide, through the long gap between games all the way to the sequels release, most companies today would kill for that kind of brand loyalty.

You can just as easily find a version of this that paints them as corrupt corporate puppets

 The game itself is a first person shooter, based on fighting on and over the continents of the planet Auraxis (with the inclusion of more planets in the future to be very likely), capturing bases, defending resources, fighting back and forth in a war that never ends. While that would be incredibly dark and depressing in real life, in a video game its perfect, when the players get organized it actually looks somewhat like a real war instead of pixel men fighting over other pixels, with tanks actually being used to provide support and with air support being flown by people who actually know how to fly!

It changes everything, really

Maybe that isn't enough to convince you. Maybe you blood lust isn't stoked yet and my words aren't enough for you. That's fine, I got a video for you to look at that I think is the best piece of free advertising this game ever got. (WARNING: CURSE WORDS, also violence and stuff yeah BUT CURSE WOOOOORDS)

 If any of this convinced you, you can snag PlanetSide 2 and jump into the endless war here

More bombs than an explosives convention.

When you think of MMOs, you usually picture a fantasy RPG populated by angry twelve year olds who spew curses in every sentence that shoots out of their mouths, people with names like XxXSepheroth420xXx, gold farmers who only speak in either Chinese or Korean (South or North, it doesn't matter) fat people who LIVE in the game almost 24/7/365, and erotic roleplayers who range from unsettling to mildly terrifying. You probably wouldn't picture EXPLOSIONS EVERYWHERE ALL THE TIME. But you will after you check out what I got for you today!

From the set of Bayformers!

Its a MMO based fan made Bomberman game that you can play out of your browser. But this isnt some eight player deathman like it was on the SNES, Bombermine supports ONE THOUSAND PLAYERS at a time. That means huge maps, power ups everywhere, and bombs going off at all time. While some new additions have been added, the game play is still classic Bomberman.

Dont ask him about his nose or his mouth, he's sensitive about it

Bomermine is still in beta however, so its still every rough around the edges but all of the gameplay is ready to rock and roll. If you like silly browser games to kill time in, like MMOs, or you're just a big fan of Bomberman and are bummed that no one really did anything for the 30th anniversary, then Bombermine might be what you're looking for. I mean can you really go wrong with Bomberman?

YES, YES YOU CAN

Ok that was just the one time. You can play Bombermine right from your browser here

Region of the Mentally Unstable Deity

Up next we’ve got a neat little browser MMO called “REALM OF THE MAD GOD”, wherein you stomp around the titular realm of the Mad God and you proceed to SHOOT THE HELL OUT OF EVERYTHING. Good practice for when mutants eventually overrun the earth.

Soon

The game works from a top down perspective that’s follows your 2D pixilated adventurer as you roam about shooting things. Basic RPG and MMO standards apply, HP, MP, EXP, all the alphabet soup abbreviations are there.

As are the typical names people use in MMOs

You’ve got a small inventory that’s supplemented with a permanent storage vault in the game’s city. The games gimmick is that perma-death is always on, and that’s its built around going through multiple characters. The idea is that you find awesome stuff that you cant use for your current character, so you go back and stick it in the Vault.

Later when I'm a ninja I'm totally gonna be kick ass you guys

 You take a class, level it up to a certain point, and then a new class is available. HOWEVER: only one character slot is available. Want to try out that new class you unlocked? You better find the nearest angry mob of gnomes and start looking for hugs.

Really BAD practice for when mutants overrun the earth

 Like all multiplayer games, and MMOs in particular, its far better when played with friends, roaming around shooting things (its basically “Bullet Hell, the MMO”) and theres even a spell that allows you to teleport to another player, no matter how far away they are, for free, and it only has a ten second cool down.

HOW THEY GET YOU: The game might be free, but theres things in the game that cost real money. The game uses two different currencies for different things. Fame is what you get when one of your characters die, and the other is gold which you get for real money, both of which are used for a number of things, but it’s the gold that gets you the good stuff. Like most Free-to-play MMOs, you don’t NEED to buy things with real life money to enjoy the game, but they certainly help, and one of the big things that the gold gets you is another character slot, which would allow you to keep unlocking classes without having to kill off that character. Get particularly attached to your wizard because you killed some of the games big bosses with it? Either slap down five bucks to keep it while you try out other stuff, suck it up and run head first into some zombie wizards, or just stop unlocking classes entirely.

They give you one hundred for free when you start though, which is nice

That aside, REALM OF THE MAD GOD is still a fun little browser MMO, and its fully possible to you just drop in and play it, no registration needed (thought that probably allows you to name your character, I was stuck with Risrr as a default) I recommend getting some friends together and killing some time by shooting monsters.

R.I.P Risrr, you were taken too soon

Realm of the Mad God is available for free at http://www.realmofthemadgod.com/
Or you could play it on steam, if you're into that http://store.steampowered.com/app/200210/
(page includes trailer)